How to Prepare for Your First Date (Man to Man)

Aah…the first date. Nothing will bring more angst than the first time you are preparing to take out your potential dream girl. It’s easy to get caught up in the mood and forget all the little things you wanted to say and/or do. Relax! I have a step by step guide to help you on this important evening. If you follow my steps correctly, your first date may be the first in a lifetime of dates.

Planning
The first thing you want to do is plan a date that would be mutually enjoyable for you and your date. I’m assuming you read my article on ‘How to have a mini date.’ If you did you would already know through the mini dates what your date likes and dislikes. If you haven’t read that article, shame on you! Go read it! 😉

Seriously, you should know the basics of the woman you’re taking dating in lahore out. Her favorite food, color, flower(s), scent, places to go, topics of interest, movie(s), and extracurricular activities to name a few. Take into account her likes/dislikes when planning the evening.

A first date requires planning. You should try to plan your first date 2-3 days in advance, and if possible, set the date for a weekend. Check the 7 day forecast in your area to make sure that adverse weather won’t affect your evening. A good first date day and time depends on your date, the plans for the evening, and your geographical location. A suitable start time can be anywhere from 7:00-9:00pm. If a weekend is not mutually agreeable, plan it for a day when time won’t be an issue for either party.

Plan your dinner at a restaurant that you’re familiar with, but try to avoid your favorite restaurant. Make reservations where you know the food and service is good, but the staff and management doesn’t know you. It can make for an awkward evening if you go to you and your ex’s favorite place.

When planning your first date you want to implement things she likes, things she would like to try, and things you like, in that order. Be open to try something new, as long it’s related to either you or your dates interest. Remember that women like a man who can take charge and be in control, as long as they don’t try to control them.

Confirmation
Now that you’ve already planned your evening, it’s a good thing to confirm all of the plans the day of the date. First confirm the date with your date, preferably in the late morning to early afternoon. The early afternoon represents a time that is late enough to not disturb your dates beauty rest or previous nights’ activities, yet early enough before they get into their afternoon activities. Between 11 am-1pm is a good time to call.

After confirming the time and meeting place (preferably her house) with your date, take the opportunity to inform her thoroughly of the plans for the evening. Tell her the name and type (cuisine) of restaurant you’re going, the atmosphere (intimate, friendly, loud), the location (city, suburbs, or beach) and what you’re planning on wearing for the date.

Among the most important things to do is tell her what you’re going to wear. This is important because you’ll want to see if her style and sense of fashion coordinates with yours, as well as do you (both) look ‘good’ as a ‘couple.’ Don’t leave anything to ‘surprise!’ Surprises are only good for Birthdays and Anniversaries; they’re not appropriate for first dates. The best surprise you can give your date is your preparedness for an evening of fun and enjoyment. Of course, little things like flowers and candy wouldn’t hurt.

Confirm with the restaurant the time and type of reservation you requested making sure the host(ess) reads back your reservation and any special request (private table, flowers, and/or chilled wine, ocean view, etc) you might have given them.

Lastly confirm any extra activities you had planned for after dinner whether it is movies, a sporting event, or the theatre. Confirming (checking) the weather forecast for the evening is also a smart thing to do. If the forecast calls for rain, bring an umbrella.

Grooming
The first date is your best opportunity to make your best ‘first’ impression and you should take every advantage of that opportunity. Essential grooming is must! The morning of the date a visit to the barber or stylist is in order for a first date. Get a nice haircut and shave. The six o’clock shadow only looks good in movies. In reality woman like to see that the man they’re with is well groomed. Grooming doesn’t make you a metrosexual or ubersexual as they like to call it. Well groomed just simply means you take pride in your appearance, especially in public on a first date. In addition, there’s something refreshing, even empowering, in the way you feel after you’re had a nice haircut and shave.

Clothing
Nothing will set the tone more for your first date than what you choose to wear. While many women like to go and buy new outfits for their first date, I strongly discourage men from doing it. Your first date is all about you being relaxed and in control. It’s hard to do that if you keep fidgeting around because your pants are uncomfortable, shoes are too tight, and/or your jacket doesn’t fit.

On the first date it’s good to resort to clothes you’re familiar and comfortable in. The clothes you wear and style you have may be different than the next man; however some universal truism apply. You should have a nice pair of pressed dress slacks, long sleeve cotton shirt, sport jacket, and nicely shined shoes.

Lay all of your clothes out on your bed or valet if you have one. Lay the slacks, shirt, belt, and jacket on the bed to make sure everything coordinates in both fashion sense and color. Then add the two most important accessories; the shoes and the watch.

A watch is to a man, what a purse is to a woman. It’s that quintessential accessory that defines your character and sense of style. A bad timepiece can mean a short evening and more future evenings alone. A nice timepiece shows that you have the sense of fashion and style to go the distance.

The shoes make the outfit. Period. A great pair of shoes can save a bad outfit; however no designer in the world can save you if you have a bad pair of shoes. Every man should have no less than 3 pair of quality dress shoes in his closet. Two of which should be black.

Personal Hygiene
It doesn’t matter what you wear, how you look, or even how nice your shoes are if you have body odor (BO) and/or bad breathe. Nothing will end the date faster than poor personal hygiene. BO is an offense that can be both controlled and prevented.

Before you put on any clothes you should wash thoroughly. Try using a layered approach to hygiene.

Take a shower and use soap initially, but finish off with a nice body wash and loofah. Use a nice fragrance shampoo and rinse completely. After lightly drying it’s good to use a body spray all over your body. After the body spray use a nice under arm anti-perspirant and deodorant, preferably gel, although powder is certainly acceptable. Aerosol spray should be your last option.

For oral hygiene use a prewash oral rinse, followed by a thorough cleaning of your teeth, gums, and tongue. Lastly use a good mouthwash to lock in that fresh breathe. It’s also good to carry a pack of sugarless gum with you throughout the date to ensure your breath is fresh at every stage of the date, and to be able to offer your date a piece to ensure that her breathe is fresh as well.

Last is the cologne. A little dab will do you is the universally accepted and appreciated amount. There’s no need to spray bath in cologne after you already showered. Lightly spray some on your jacket and/or shirt, and run your wrist against the sprayed on section and that will be sufficient.

Mental Preparedness
The average person’s cause of dating anxiety is self inflicted. Dating is like anything else in life. The people that do it the best, and are the most successful at it, are the ones that are best prepared, and able to adapt to changes as they happen.

If you already followed the steps outlined above, you are already ahead of most daters. Now all you need to do is visualize the date. You’ve planned, cleaned, and dressed and now you have to see the benefits of your labor BEFORE the date begins. Sit down in your nice comfortable chair and putt on some jazz, classical, or mood music to soothe and relax you.

Mentally walk yourself through each aspect of the date from the moment you pick her up, to the conversations that you’ll have, to the time spent at the restaurant, and so on and so forth. See every part of the date going exactly as you planned it, knowing that you planned the evening flawlessly. Once you visualized the whole date, now it’s time to do literally what you’ve done virtually.

Be Flexible
As great as it is to plan things, sometimes you have to be able to let go and allow the ‘flow’ of the evening to take its own course. You may have planned for dinner and the theatre, but maybe dinner and the hot tub is what the date dictated; or maybe you planned an evening of fun, but your date is willing to turn it into a weekend of enjoyment. It can happen! The main thing is to be in control enough to have the date planned, but be loose enough to adopt if your date wants to change.

These are things to do to prepare for a first date. If you follow these same steps, you will have the confidence in knowing that even if you’re not with the girl of your dreams, your date will still go smoothly.

 

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